Sheev Palpatine 87 Posted March 6, 2018 (edited) Greetings, Comrade! TLA Command is announcing their new introduction to the world of Gun Running. We have a large surplus of cheap cold-war era weaponry that we do not need for our soldiers. We are making all of them available to Civillians, with the exception of war vehicles - We believe they are too powerful to fall into the wrong hands.(also getting banned sucks) Here is a list of all weapons we offer: Rifles AKM - $60,000 - Ol' Reliable. 7.62x39mm, thirty round magazines(not included), baby! What's not to love? AKS - $60,000 - Super cool folding version of Ol' Reliable. FN FAL - $80,000 - The right arm of the Free world? Hah! You wish! Lee Enfield - $30,000 - Cheap, bolt action, but very powerful. SA-58V/SA-58P - $60,000 - The Czechs decided the AKM sucked, so they made their own. It's that good shit. AK74/AK74KOBRA/AK74U/AKS74 - $90,000 - More modern version of Ol' Reliable. Less damage, but less recoil. More accurate than my ability to park a car. And I park cars for a living! AK74(PSO1) - $150,000 - Woah, you think you're Chris Kyle or something? AK74(KOBRA, GL) - $150,000 - Say hello to my little friend! You've got that high-tech Kobra sight, AND a grenade launcher? A motherfucking grenade launcher! AK107(KOBRA) - $175,000 - Now THIS is a modern gun. Firing the same 5.45x39 as the AK74 variants, this little bastard fires 'em nearly twice as fast! Now THAT's firepower! AK107(PSO1) - $200,000 - Like the AK74(PSO1), but like, 10 times the coolierness. AK107(PSO1,GL) - $225,000 - Seriously? Who designed this beast? It may weigh 27 and a half pounds, but trust me, it'll be useful in combat! AK107(GL,KOBRA) - $200,000 - What it says on the can. A fast-firing AK with a grenade launcher and a red-dot. Good for killing blufor scum fighting in urban settings. SVD/SVD(DESERT) - $300,000 - Russia's trusted it for years, why can't you? 10 shots, 1-hit-kill to the chest, semi auto, can hit to 800m out accurately. SVD(WOODLAND) - $215,000 - For some reason we have woodland camo'd stuff in the middle east. Don't ask me, I just sell stuff. M24(DESERT) - $250,000 - Okaaaaaay for some reason we have American sniper rifles. .308WIN, the ol' trusty. Good out to 800, bolt action. CZ550 - $105,000 - Good for the amateur killer of blufor scum assassin on a budget, this fires a 9.3x63mm round. Very powerful. Rocket Launchers RPG-7 - $500,000 - Ye Olden Anti-Tank Apparatus. Good for throwing missiles out to a few hundred meters. RPG-7 Rockets - ALL $150,000 - We have AP, AT, and MEGA-AT. RPG-18 - $400,000 - Russia's answer to the USA's M72 LAW. If I can level with you, it's pretty shit. Just get a 7. RPG-18 Rocket - $100,000 - Seriously just get a 7. I'm only offering it because we have them. M79 Thumper - $100,000 - Okay, it's under the rocket launchers category but it isn't a launcher. Don't crucify me. Ol' Reliable for lobbing 40mm balls of death over a few hundred meters. M79 40MM HE - $3,000 - What? You want me to make some witty description for a 40mm grenade? It explodes. That's it. Vehicles rubs hands OH BOY HERE WE GO! We've got a huge selection of cold-war era Russian vehicles for you. I understand most people aren't particularly jumping to buy our guns because, well hell, you can get the same guns at the Terrorist Hideout. But not THESE! Cars/Trucks UAZ - $45,000 - Good Ol' Russian utility vehicle. UAZ(AGS30) - $350,000 - The AGS30 is a FULLY. FUCKING. AUTO. GRENADE LAUNCHER. Buy this now, you need it. UAZ(DSHKM) - $175,000 - Pretty damn simple. A UAZ with a big ol' shooty gun. Kamaz(Open OR Closed) - $175,000 - Russia's Premier Military Troop Transport. The inside smells like vodka. Don't ask. Kamaz(Ammunition) - $1,500,000 - Rearms vehicles. Pretty handy, don't get it shot. Or lift on fire. Or hit anything too hard. Or hit a pothole. Use at own risk. Kamaz(Repair) - $500,000 - Somehow has enough machinery on it to repair a tank that's been hit with missiles from absolutely destroyed back to fully working in seconds. Uhhh... Russia™ Kamaz(Fuel) - $300,000 - A fuel truck. Can somehow refuel diesel trucks, gasoline cars, and aircraft using jet fuel. Runs on vodka. APCs/Tanks Vodnik BPPU - $1,900,000 - A reliable military vehicle with a massive 40mm cannon on the back. Has AP and HE rounds at the ready, and a PKT underslung. A mean fighting vehicle in the hands of an experienced gunner. BMP-2 - $4,500,000 - Predecessor to the BMP3. Most of the same armament as the BTR90, minus the 40mm and the ATGM. BTR-40 DSHKM - $450,000 - A fast, lightly armored vehicle with a bigass machinegun on the top. BRDM-2 - $1,000,000 - Equipped with a light and heavy machine gun, this beast can own the streets. BRDM-2 ATGM - $2,500,000 - This monster has a huge pod of guideable, lockable AT missiles on the top. T-34 - $5,000,000 - The tank that defended Stalingrad! Just like a cuddly friend, if that cuddly friend had thick armor and a 80mm cannon! T-55 - $7,500,000 - PKT, 100mm cannon. Low profile, decent speed. Not much to say about this one. T-72 - $12,500,000 - DA! That's what a true Russian would say when he looks at this beauty. DSHKM on top if you have a commander, it's got some very strong armor, has a decent speed, and it's got a whopping 125mm cannon on it. What can survive a 125? Nothing, that's what! ZSU-23 Shilka - $6,000,000 - Need to take out some aircraft? This is your best friend. Four massive ZU-23 cannons on the front and the ability to zoom from here to the moon, not much is escaping from this. Aircraft UH-1H Huey - $800,000 - Well, I ain't no fortunate son but I can tell you this is one hell of an aircraft! Made popular in the Vietnam conflict, the UH1H can hit speeds of 225km/h, has excellent maneuvering, and has two M240s on the side for easy offense and defense. CH-47F - $2,000,000 - The hell are you hauling? The entire continent of Europe? This thing's got you. With two MINIGUNS on the sides and an M240 on the back, excellent armor, radar, flares, and great speed, this is the ideal transport helicopter. MI-8(Medevac) - $2,500,000 - Need to do some humanitarian bullshit? This is your helicopter. MI-8 - $2,500,000 - Like the medevac version, but with guns and no pansy humanitarian shit. We don't need no morals here. Just guns. MI-8MTV-3R - $8,000,000 - Equipped with over 100 S-5 rockets, this thing can lay down the pain. Not ideal for anti-tank, as they're high explosive and best for light armor and personnel. Great speed, kind of shitty maneuvering but it can get in and out in a few seconds. Good armor, flares, radar. Ptchela 1/T - $500,000 - Uhhh... yeah I don't even know. It's really good for getting into places undetected. We spy on blufor do cool stuff with it all the time. So that's about it. We might add some more things to our inventory, we don't know yet. We currently sell to Civs(0% markup), NATO/UN Forces(25% Markup), and Independents(50% markup, there are certain things we will NOT sell to indeps. Anything anti-air is out.) CIVS: MAKE SURE YOU DECLARE TERROR BEFORE BUYING OUR VEHICLES. CIVS: IF YOU USE OUR VEHICLES OR WEAPONS FOR ACTS OF MASS MURDER OR MASS DESTRUCTION YOU WILL BE BARRED FROM BUYING OUR PRODUCTS EVER AGAIN, AND YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY AND ALL COMP/DAMAGE YOU CAUSE. TLA GUN RUNNERS IS NOT RESPONSIBE FOR ANY DEATH, PTSD, PHYSICAL TRAUMA, MENTAL TRAUMA, ACTS OF MASS MURDER, ACTS OF MASS DESTRUCTION, CRYING, BURNING, CHOKING, SCREAMING, AGONY, ETERNAL TORTURE, ETC. USERS OF THESE PRODUCTS ARE SOLELY RESPONSIBLE FOR THEIR ACTIONS. Due to TheEliteP's school shooting mass bombing with one of our vehicles last night, we are discontinuing our line of MI24s, BMP-3s, and L39ZAs. We apologize for any inconvenience this may cause. Edited March 7, 2018 by Sheev Palpatine 4 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lex_The_Great 32 Posted March 6, 2018 11 minutes ago, Sheev Palpatine said: TLA Command 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sheev Palpatine 87 Posted March 6, 2018 One satisfied customer! Keegan with his brand-new T34! Thank you for your business! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Smidge Griffkin 154 Posted March 6, 2018 Civilian/Indep Smidge likes this.. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mez 186 Posted March 6, 2018 Dude that's gangster bro. 2 hours ago, Sheev Palpatine said: MI-24V - $15,000,000 - Have you been killed by Sheev Palpatine? It was probably with this. This is my baby right here. 80 S-8KOM HE/AT(LIGHT armor) rockets, the same YAK-B as the MI24, and 4 Shturm ATGMs(your gunner can lock and guide) - this thing is an evil bitch. pls dont make it a war vehicle i'll cry 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nureha 10 Posted March 6, 2018 i want to say....members of the Nato Force already have PTSD i watched an mi-24 strafe rasmin within 2.4 seconds..... we lost 3/4 of Rasmin's Population greatly...... 1 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Smidge Griffkin 154 Posted March 6, 2018 (edited) 47 minutes ago, Nureha said: i want to say....members of the Nato Force already have PTSD i watched an mi-24 strafe rasmin within 2.4 seconds..... we lost 3/4 of Rasmin's Population greatly...... Many lives were lost........may they rest in pieces lol, but much entertainment was had by those of us spectating Edited March 6, 2018 by Smidge Griffkin 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nureha 10 Posted March 6, 2018 5 hours ago, Smidge Griffkin said: Many lives were lost........may they rest in pieces lol, but much entertainment was had by those of us spectating mhm Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sheev Palpatine 87 Posted March 6, 2018 6 hours ago, Nureha said: i want to say....members of the Nato Force already have PTSD i watched an mi-24 strafe rasmin within 2.4 seconds..... we lost 3/4 of Rasmin's Population greatly...... only 2 cops died in the entire attack, the city just got flattened. also we're never selling to theelitep ever again 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sheev Palpatine 87 Posted March 7, 2018 More satisfied customers! SilkoFoxx and Smidge Griffkin with their brand-new MI-8MTVs! 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Creepy Iceceam 11 Posted March 7, 2018 I think selling tanks/attack helis to civs so they attack blufor is grounds for war. Kek Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JumpyWizard 91 Posted March 7, 2018 +1 love it, even as a main blufor 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sheev Palpatine 87 Posted March 7, 2018 5 hours ago, JumpyWizard said: +1 love it, even as a main blufor We sell to blufor too Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DOMOCOP14 23 Posted March 7, 2018 -1 There's a reason why cives don't have access to these items or vehicles in the first place Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ComradeCorbyn{Socialist} 57 Posted March 7, 2018 10 minutes ago, DOMOCOP14 said: -1 There's a reason why cives don't have access to these items or vehicles in the first place -1 for the reasons stated Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sheev Palpatine 87 Posted March 7, 2018 3 minutes ago, ComradeCorbyn{Socialist} said: -1 for the reasons stated 13 minutes ago, DOMOCOP14 said: -1 There's a reason why cives don't have access to these items or vehicles in the first place It's specifically allowed within the rules for us to do this. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DOMOCOP14 23 Posted March 7, 2018 I'm not saying its against the rules but it's not gonna end well Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sheev Palpatine 87 Posted March 7, 2018 Well, we've sold around $80 million so far and only had 1 extreme incident. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sheev Palpatine 87 Posted March 7, 2018 also this isnt a suggestion or an application lmao whats with the -1s Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DOMOCOP14 23 Posted March 7, 2018 just voicing my opinion Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Smidge Griffkin 154 Posted March 7, 2018 Big ups to the opfor lads for providing some fun rp opportunities. Soviet yard sales are my favorite.... Boohoo to the naysayers. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Silkofoxx 55 Posted March 8, 2018 (edited) Highly Recommend having an Application form to this to prevent mass killings. Ranks to add what vehicles you can buy and what vehicles you can't More you buy the higher Rank you go ( meaning the higher tier vehicles you can buy ) (Example :: When EliteP bought the Mi-24 and massacred everyone in Rasman City) Also adding a blacklist would help too when people break the rules of the application Edited March 8, 2018 by Silkofoxx 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sheev Palpatine 87 Posted March 8, 2018 8 hours ago, Silkofoxx said: Highly Recommend having an Application form to this to prevent mass killings. Ranks to add what vehicles you can buy and what vehicles you can't More you buy the higher Rank you go ( meaning the higher tier vehicles you can buy ) (Example :: When EliteP bought the Mi-24 and massacred everyone in Rasman City) Also adding a blacklist would help too when people break the rules of the application We have a blacklist, elitep was the first person on it 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sheev Palpatine 87 Posted March 9, 2018 1 hour ago, StarBoSS said: -1 no u 1 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
